A Chicken at the Kitchen Sink

I could start this blog by telling a small lie – but I won’t. Rather, I will admit straight off, that the photographs which I have lately been taking are flat and non-dimensional because I’ve been using my camera like a Muppet. The lie would be that I’m an artist – and the resulting photographs are art.

            Take for instance this rather fetching photo of a deer (all jokes gratefully received). This was taken with my zoom lens, carefully honed in on the deer that was taking its morning stroll in our garden. Technically, it shouldn’t have been there – it’s actually in our tree plantation and was probably nibbling bark off our young trees – we should have been trying to get rid of it (which would have brought a whole new meaning to the phrase 'getting the perfect shot') but, fortunately for the deer, we instead admired it and I struggled to get the perfect shot (of the other variety).

            Note also this lovely photo of a chicken at our kitchen sink. Rob was not impressed – apparently I should have been getting the chicken out of there, not taking photos. See the flat quality to my photograph? The lack of depth?  I spent five minutes trying to adjust things – until the bird got fed up of looking at my pots and went on its way. Five minutes of wondering what was wrong but failing to note the readings on my camera – the focal length of 4.5 or the shutter speed of 40 – important readings which would have told me that I had my camera set on Macro (close-up) yet I was taking a picture at a distance? Arghh. Why did they start making cameras that have brains? Think how lovely my deer pictures would have been if I’d had it set on landscape – or even just on auto and left it up to the camera.

            Now, if you’re at all interested in how far you can stretch the boundaries of visual representation and call it art; take a look at this year’s Turner Prize winners. Whilst George Shaw’s humbrol enamel paintings of Tile Hill are, for me at least, spectacular; I have to admit to being left rather stuck for words at Karla Black’s sculpture which, being crafted from soap bombs and peeling paint, is possibly not even there now.

            And so for some food. I thought I’d spend some time on light meals – the kind of food where you enjoy the flavours but feel virtuous afterwards (and you can glug an extra glass of wine without wrecking your calorie count). But, even if healthy salads aren’t your cup of tea – please do try the beer bread – it’s great with everything; in fact I’d go so far as to say, beer bread is the new black.

Recipe: Warm Goats’ Cheese on Beer Bread Toasts with salad

Inspired by: Something we ate in Café Rouge many years ago

Ingredients:

(for the bread)

225g Strong white bread flour

115g Rye flour (plus extra for dusting)

1 teaspoon salt

1 packet fast action yeast

225ml ale or stout

1 tablespoon of olive oil

2 teaspoons of runny honey

Here’s What I Do:

(Use a mixer if you have one as this is a very wet dough.) Combine the dry ingredients, then add the oil and honey. Stir well. Slowly add the beer (you need to make sure the froth has died back so that it’s measured accurately but also add the beer slowly – you may not need the full amount). Knead the dough in the mixer for several minutes then finish off by hand on a cool work top. As this is a wet dough you need to persevere if you can but if you really have to then add some flour. You are aiming for a smooth dough though it probably won’t get as silky as a traditional white dough. Shape it into a round and place it on greased and floured baking sheet. Slash the top with five deep slashes. Leave to prove in a warm place until doubled in size. Bake in a pre-heated oven at Gas Mark 6/200°C for 20-25 minutes. (For a less rustic but less stressful loaf you can make this in your bread-maker – if yours doesn’t have a beer bread recipe, just choose one of the Rye bread recipes and substitute some or all of the liquid for beer.)

(for the salad)

Good goats’ cheese (usually)

Salad ingredients to your liking

Plus

Onions

Tomatoes

Garlic

Olive oil

Here’s what I do:

Put the tomatoes (quartered if large) in an oven proof dish and roast with olive oil and chopped garlic. Thinly slice your onions and caramelise them in a frying pan with olive oil (and a dash of sugar towards the end if you like). Grill the slices of beer bread. Assemble your salad ingredients on your plates. Depending on the type of goats’ cheese you may or may not wish to grill this (I like to let the firm, log style ones melt down a bit). Plate up the meal so it all looks nice, adding salad dressing or olive oil as you prefer to your leaves.